Listerine Zero Mouthwash, 1.0 Liter (Pack of 6)

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Price: $41.99    

Product Feature

• Less intense Clean Mint flavor and unique alcohol-free formula
• No other alcohol-free mouthwash has been proven more effective at killing bad breath germs
• Contains signature 4 Essential Oils found in Listerine Antiseptic for bad breath protection
• From the #1 Dentist recommended Otc Mouthwash Brand

Product Description

Listerine Zero Mouthwash The Less Intense, Zero Alcohol formula cleans deep to kill millions of bad breath germs for a cleaner, fresher mouth!

Listerine Zero Mouthwash, 1.0 Liter (Pack of 6) Review

I'm not a fan of gargling hot lava first thing in the morning. So I have long considered Listerine a kind of necessary evil. Yeah, it'll kill the germs and make everything minty fresh. In the process, it will slap you awake with the unadulterated sting of hot alcohol-on-flesh action. Every morning I found myself hearing the infamous Ralph Wiggum quote ricocheting through my mind: "Tastes like burning!"

Enter Listerine Zero. I was skeptical when I learned about this alcohol-free product which claimed to be gentle and pleasing on the delicate innards of my face. "Mouthwash without the burn?!" I yelled incredulously at no one in particular, chuckling at the nonsense of it all. BURNING is how mouthwash works, you see. The alcohol stings everything in your mouth, including bad breath germs. We live. The germs die. It is the natural order of things.

Well folks, I don't know how the good people behind Listerine have done it, but they really have delivered on their promise. I took a swig. I swished the pleasant light blue concoction around in my mouth. I noticed a slight tingling sensation but nothing like the burning of years past. Afterward, my breath was indeed minty fresh, and all was right with the world.

True story: After using Listerine Zero, I went out on a date with a pretty girl and got a kiss at the end of it. I have no idea if the two were related, but the Listerine definitely didn't hurt!

(There is only one problem with this product, and that is the insane grammatical error plastered on the front of the bottle: "Proven to kill germs that cause bad breath on contact." Most people probably won't care, but I don't much like the smell of misplaced modifiers in the morning. So I've penciled in an ellipsis after "breath," and now I can breathe easy again.)

In conclusion: Get the mouthwash. Seriously, you no longer need to put up with regular Listerine, which slaps you in the face before it tells you it loves you. It doesn't have to hurt anymore. It's not your fault. It's not your fault. It's not your fault.

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